What Americans can learn about parenting from the French.
What Americans can learn about parenting from the French. French parenting has sparked interest globally for its balanced, less-stressful approach. Many American parents are intrigued by how French parents raise children who are often well-behaved, patient, and more independent, and who seem to enjoy a more relaxed, enjoyable family life. Here are some key takeaways that Americans might consider from French parenting:
Encourage Independence Early
French parents foster independence from a young age. They encourage children to play independently, problem-solve, and entertain themselves. This builds self-sufficiency and resilience, allowing parents to maintain their own interests and avoid burnout from constant attention.
Prioritize Family Meals and Table Manners
Family meals in France are sacred. They’re an opportunity to teach children patience, appreciation for food, and the value of sitting together as a family. French children are taught to enjoy a variety of foods and to eat without snacking constantly. This tradition helps with portion control and develops good eating habits early on.
Set Clear Boundaries and Say “No”
French parents set firm, consistent boundaries, believing that children feel more secure and grounded when they know the rules. They aren’t afraid to say “no” when it’s necessary, which fosters discipline. Boundaries don’t mean a lack of freedom but rather structure within which children feel safe to explore.
Avoid “Helicopter” Parenting
In France, parents tend to take a more laid-back approach. They avoid micromanaging every aspect of their children’s lives and instead trust them to figure things out. This hands-off method allows children to learn through experience and builds their confidence.
Teach Patience and Delayed Gratification
Patience is a cornerstone in French parenting. French parents expect children to wait for things, whether it’s waiting for food or their turn in a game. This teaches delayed gratification, which is linked to self-control, better academic outcomes, and emotional resilience.
Encourage Politeness and Social Skills
French children are taught the importance of manners early on, emphasizing respect in social interactions. Saying “bonjour” (hello), “merci” (thank you), and greeting others properly are seen as crucial. These practices help children develop social awareness and empathy, valuable traits for all relationships.
Preserve Parental and Couple Identity
French parents value their roles as individuals and as a couple, not just as parents. This approach reduces parental stress and prevents resentment. In contrast to prioritizing children above all else, French parents balance their roles and make time for their own interests, which often benefits the entire family dynamic.
Teach Appreciation for Life’s Simple Pleasures
In French culture, there’s a focus on savoring small joys, from a quiet walk to a good meal. This approach teaches children to find happiness in the present moment rather than constantly seeking external validation. It encourages a relaxed approach to life, reducing pressure and fostering contentment.
By adapting some of these French parenting techniques, Americans might discover a style that blends discipline with freedom, fostering children who are capable, patient, and respectful, while also allowing parents to retain their own lives and passions.
